Overreaction, Line One

From The Smoking Gun, via Borepatch, comes a tale of a fellow — Michael Alan Skopec — who, well, has difficulty with thinking. Turns out that Michael had some trouble with his iPhone. So, instead of heading to Google or, even better, Apple, he decided it would be best to just call 911 repeatedly.

He was arrested for Disorderly Conduct. That makes sense. I mean, after all, they don’t have a charge for Felony Stupid.

The police report describe the nature of his broken iPhone, but I imagine that it was something like, “Oh, you need to type your password to download When Harry Met Sally and Thelma & Louise from the iTunes store,” so he probably lost his mind and started calling 911 while his mother was yelling down to the basement to calm down.

That guy is one of those people who needs a handler to keep him from drowning in his soup. And, because he has demonstrated such incredibly poor judgement, I’d strongly recommend that he be restrained from operating any complex machinery, like, for example, nuclear missiles, automobiles, cordless drills, and forks.

The Tassel is Worth the What?

Got this from Boy Wonder’s school the other day. It’s the graduation cap/gown/ring/memorabilia order packet:

So, what’s wrong with it?

– Public education is 13 years, not 12.

– Misspelled hassle as “hassel”.

– Incorrect capitalization.

This feels a little bit like celebrating a SCUBA certification by drowning puppies.

To the people who are pushing this crap: I’ve upped my standards. Up yours.

WTF, Google?

Seriously, what did you do with the five years’ worth of Shared items that I’ve amassed in Google Reader? Wanna give us a chance to extract our links maybe instead of just deciding arbitrarily one day that you’re going to render them inaccessible for everyone?