So, here’s the thing…

I’m 45 and a successful[1] engineer – and I’ve fought intensely with this throughout my entire life. From early grade school, through to today. Even now, I keep thinking that I’m where I am because I’ve been made part of some elaborate joke fabricated by colleagues and peers just to see how far they can push the illusion so they could have a good laugh at my expense. I hope that’s not it, and yet I obsess with the possibility.

[1] Me: “I don’t think I’m successful. Maybe I shouldn’t put that word there.”

Yeah, but people tell you that you are – they respect you.

Me: “Maybe they’re just being nice?”

Maybe they’re being honest?

Me: “Maybe you’re in on the joke!”

Jesus, will you just click the Comment button already?

Me: “But what if…”