American English speakers, listen up — and, yes, this does tend to be primarily a monolingual American issue, so I’m calling you out. Why? Because languages are more than just twenty-six letters and a few numerals along with words and concepts more complex and expressive than “fuck” with every other utterance.
Sharing a sad tale of fear, isolation, and sorrow and following it with this 🤣 or this 😂 won’t convey the message or meaning that you think it will. Those are “rolling on the floor, laughing” and “tears of joy”.
Unless, of course, you’re a fan of Sadism or perhaps Schadenfreude. Self-schadenfreude? Is that a thing? I’m reminded of a line from Prisoner of Azkaban, “So you’re gonna suffer, but you’re gonna be happy about it.”
If you insist on including a few emojis in your statement, perhaps what you mean to use is this: 😢 or this 😭
And, while I’m at it — because it seems that people still have some difficulty with this new-fangled interwebs-fad and the whole emojis concept — this is the flag of the nation of Liberia: 🇱🇷
While this is the American flag: 🇺🇸
Wow, we really skewed things when we gave Latin/English/Americans an extra 146,859 characters more than the 26 letters in the English alphabet.
We’re not planning on ever needing a tool like this — but for anyone who may be seeking to name children and you’re struggling with cultures, Mixed Name is an interesting tool.
Pick your two cultures, choose a gender (or no gender if desired) then search…
Yes, yes, for a fee, it’ll reveal all names that it finds.
But it’ll certainly provide you freely with a starting point.
Okay, the article didn’t say “WAF” — use your imagination.
Next, I don’t speak for All Americans the same way that I don’t speak for All Men or All People. I’m just somebody. But, read over the list — here are my own thoughts to go along with them:
Yes, there are some people that are intent on attending one specific university. Those people are strange. I didn’t know that I was going to university until I just randomly picked one that was convenient. The second time? Eh, same thing, really. Didn’t know. Didn’t plan for it. Didn’t expect it.
No, they don’t. And if they do, then it’s absolutely a psychological extension of the fluorescent light trope.
Again, no, they don’t. Trope.
Yes! They do have and actually get school lunches. In fact, it’s called the National School Lunch Program. People often complain about the lunches, but it’s not poisonous and it’s a damned sight better than having nothing at all.
Occasionally. But, no, not nearly as often as depicted in movies. It’s trope.
Okay, yes. Yes, nearly every school does have its own mascot. Typically Jr. High (7th & 8th) and High School (9th – 12th). It tended to be a symbol around which we could apply our efforts for sports… and we had a social justification to leverage it as a “we” vs. “they” symbol.
Cliché. See also: trope.
It’s a TV show thing. Then again, it may be an ‘everyone’ thing, but it certainly doesn’t happen in my home.
Nah, they really do. I never understood them. Prom. Homecoming. Valentines Day. Halloween. So, yeah, pretty much one for every season.
Yeah, I have no idea why they’s say that, but it could be a pedestrian attempt by the show’s writers because they can’t think of an exact location to call out or want to avoid the effort it would take to add clarifying statements. But I agree.
What British accent? There are loads of British accents.
Yes. Well, they did. It seems to be losing favor. Often it would be respectful to refer to them as Mr. or Mrs. Surname until the parent were to say, “Oh, please, call me…”. See also, duzen wir uns.
I avoided cheerleaders throughout school, so I haven’t any frame of reference.
Depends on the school, but yes, it was common to have a project to demonstrate the creativity and comprehension of concepts. I think there was some degree of projects in nearly every course apart from mathematics.
It’s an overused trope.
Mmm… PB&J. Yes, we do. Not everyone. But it’s rather common regionally. There are better and worse peanut butters. And then there’s the debate about whether to use jam, or jelly.
Bacon, when eaten by itself or as a side to some main course, is typically eaten with fingers.
Okay, I’m somewhat out of touch with television — I’m not sure what’s meant by “fake babies, getting ‘married’ to each other”. I can say that it was common for young children — perhaps 6 or 8 — to “play house” and pretend to be married. Not sure what you mean though.
Yes. Yes, they do. From 1st-grade through 12th. We had to stand and recite the Pledge of Allegiance at the beginning of every single school day. Every. Single. Day. How to say it is defined in U.S.C. §4.
Yeah, I don’t think I’ve ever had somebody ask, in 48 years, how I like eggs while they’re already in the active process of cooking them.
No. And if they do, then they absolutely deserve whatever they get. Also, their password is probably “1-2-3-4-5” or “changeme”.
Laziness on the part of both the actors and directors.
No. Not everyday. I think I’ve had pancakes like two or three times this year.
Not all. But summer camps are a thing. I attended summer camp twice when I was in grade school. It was rather fun as I recall.
Not at all common.
Yeah, it’s often a TV-thing.
Probably about as often as they might say, “Please do…” or “help yourself”.
I do not.
There are places that this is acceptable: salons, conference rooms, community break-rooms… but I don’t think I’ve ever had bottles of water just sitting in the refrigerator.
Garbage disposals.
Okay I rather like a fireplace. But, I don’t get excited about it. I have one and in a year, I think I had a fire in it once. Maybe twice.
Sometimes called “mystery meat”. There are variations across many cultures around the world, so this one’s a bit of a curiosity to me. Although, I would also argue that it’s likely just a lazy story object.
No. No, they don’t. Most humans apart from the Maasai and some Northern Europeans, become rather lactose intolerant in adulthood.
Yep, they do. Detention is usually only 45 min or an hour after school.
No, not everyone wants to have their own reality TV show.
Continuity issues, probably.
Perhaps because trucks have become the ultimate utilitarian vehicle.
Do not jump immediately to the assumption that everything must be a conspiracy. Hanlon’s Razor always applies: “Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity.”
And we, in America specifically, are absolutely floundering in — nay. Swimming… basking? — stupidity, arrogance, and a considerable amount of denial.
We — yes, I’m still looking at you, Fellow Americans — could’ve had this sorted a few months ago within just a few weeks and returned to some semblance or normality. But, oh, no… people get together in large groups to protest, argue, and yell about infringing upon “m’rights!”
No, there’s not some government conspiracy to manipulate you into wearing a hijab and accepting Islam.
No, there’s no government conspiracy to force the AI to learn how to use facial recognition through a mask*.
The situation we’re faced with presently, having endured the death of, so far 150,000 Americans, is the direct result of literally screaming at everybody about your “rights”.
But there’s a fundamental right not being discussed — the right to exist.
Your “rights” are fine… up to the moment that your rights negatively impact another’s right to exist, then the discussion and debate becomes meaningless.
Now, let’s talk about conspiracy for a moment:
Borrowing a quote from an old-ish movie from way back in 1984:
That terminator is out there.
It can’t be bargained with. It can’t be reasoned with. It doesn’t feel pity or remorse or fear, and it absolutely will not stop. Ever! Until you are dead.
Kyle Reese, Resistance Soldier, The Terminator (1984)
Oh, sorry, let me make one small adjustment to that quote, perhaps it’ll be meaningful — or perhaps it becomes too ‘meta’ for people to comprehend:
That virus is out there.
It can’t be bargained with. It can’t be reasoned with. It doesn’t feel pity or remorse or fear, and it absolutely will not stop. Ever! Until you are dead.
You cannot negotiate with a virus. It cares not of your age, gender, race, financial status, political affiliation, or belief system.
Yes, some viruses are rather harmless as far as viruses go — rhinovirus is a good example.
Others are somewhat horrifying. Especially horrifying because there’s a significant pre-symptomatic period (a few weeks) where somebody can be contagious and not even know they’re spreading a virus.
—
* It’s an absolutely meaningless argument about how, somehow, your face — or your own name, FFS — could possibly be used against you. I’m still trying to comprehend that line or reasoning. Don’t believe me? Go ask an actual, licensed attorney.
the rest of me 