Things to Stop Saying to Yourself

onlinecounsellingcollege:

1. “I’m no good at …”

Say instead “It’s just a skill, and something I can learn.”

2. “I’m such a failure …”

Say instead “I got it wrong, and everybody makes mistakes.”

3. “There’s no point in trying …”

Say instead “It maybe hard, but step by step will get me there in time.”

4. “Everybody hates me; I’ve got no friends …”

Say instead “It doesn’t really matter what these people think about me. There are others who will recognize my value and true worth.”

5. “I hate myself. I deserve to be rejected …”

Say instead “I am beautiful inside, and have value and worth. I deserve to be cherished and be treated well.”

For those family, friends, and team members who sometimes need reminders.

Signs that You’re Being Manipulated

onlinecounsellingcollege:

1. They twist your words and use them against you.

2. They’re mean – but then they say that you misunderstood them.

3. They make you feel guilty for saying, no.

4. They act cold towards you if you don’t do what they want.

5. You never feel as if you meet their expectations.

6. You feel as if you’re walking on eggshells all the time.

7. You feel very confused by the relationship.

8. You constantly feel anxious about the relationship.

9. It causes you to question your own sanity.

I’ll just leave this here.

Impostor Syndrome: You’re Doing Better Than You Think

So, here’s the thing…

I’m 45 and a successful[1] engineer – and I’ve fought intensely with this throughout my entire life. From early grade school, through to today. Even now, I keep thinking that I’m where I am because I’ve been made part of some elaborate joke fabricated by colleagues and peers just to see how far they can push the illusion so they could have a good laugh at my expense. I hope that’s not it, and yet I obsess with the possibility.

[1] Me: “I don’t think I’m successful. Maybe I shouldn’t put that word there.”

Yeah, but people tell you that you are – they respect you.

Me: “Maybe they’re just being nice?”

Maybe they’re being honest?

Me: “Maybe you’re in on the joke!”

Jesus, will you just click the Comment button already?

Me: “But what if…”