Things I Learned from The Walking Dead

I did Mantracker, so here’s The Walking Dead. First, though, a few disclaimers: this is based on the first two or three episodes of the show, then I stopped watching it. Not that I didn’t want to, but because Dish Network, for reasons known only to their marketing department, dropped  AMC from my lineup.

On to the list, in no particular order:

  • Use the stereotyped racist guy as bait. A few problems solved.
  • Box vans don’t have seat belts in back–drive slowly. No need to rush.
  • Car alarms don’t keep going and going and going and going.
  • Handguns aren’t cannons. Have a clue how to use them.
  • Rifles do kick a bit.
  • No need to waste ammunition.
  • CB radios (handheld especially) are worthless for anything more than a few miles. Become a Ham and have a clue. :-).
  • Have a knife — it is quite possibly the most useful tool you can possess at any time, anywhere.
  • In the Zombie Apocalypse, everyone on the team should be armed.
  • Teams? Travel in them.
  • Have some useful skills to contribute to the team.
  • Have a plan.
  • Have a backup plan.
  • Don’t take chances if you don’t need to.
  • Only engage if you have superior numbers.
  • Drama? Avoid it. There are enough things to worry about without engaging in drama.
  • Okay, some of those are a bit petty. Some really only applicable to the impossibility of Zombie Apocalypse. Fun to ponder, nonetheless.

    Things I Learned From Watching Mantracker

    In no particular order, here are a few things I’ve learned from watching Mantracker:

  • Understand your position, status, limitations, and goal — from that, build a plan.
  • Acknowledge that your trackers are professionals. They are probably far better at tracking than you are at evading. Therefore, never taunt your trackers, never attempt to track them, and recognize your lack of skill.
  • The tracker is the predator, you are prey.
  • Know how to navigate. Dead reckoning, maps, compasses. GPS isn’t always an option.
  • Two words: Shut. Up.
  • Know yourself and especially your limitations.
  • Know your gear and how to use it. Never abandon it.
  • Travel at night whenever possible.
  • Stay out of lights and off ridges, roads, and paths.
  • Use fire sparingly–not at all if possible.
  • Soap, aftershave, perfumes, smoking, and cooking are absolutely taboo.
  • Stay away from dry leaves and branches, wet grass, mud, sand, or anything that will make noise or leave tracks.
  • A team is a team. It must have a shared goal. This is not negotiable. Never abandon your team.
  • There is no “self-sacrifice” in a team. To steal a line from Starship Troopers, “Everyone fights. No one quits.”
  • 26km (or is it miles?) is a long damn way to move on foot, especially if one is out if shape or has bad footwear.